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Mon, Jan. 21st, 2008 | 09:00 am  slavezombie


Shoot `em up
slavezombie
(click for illustration)

The thing about writing film is, before it is down on paper, the idea for the plot and the cliff hangers all sound good in my head. I saw two movies on DVD this weekend. One was Shoot `em up (yes, I know. In a previous entry I said I wouldn't waste two precious hours of reading time to watch that, but it was good.) and The Simpsons Movie.

The writer/director of Shoot `em up stated in interviews a technique he used to plan out scenes by drawing them in storyboards. The thing I don't like about doing storyboards is that they're so rough, and I'm coming from a low budget school system of conservation of paper can't be used to scribble ugly, action figures. Then again, I'm not fulfilling my attempts to draw funniness in the cartoons I post on Q.4 the Hlwd buzz.

About the movie (DVD). It's action packed. The backstory that keeps you wanting more is the cute little baby in the film, and the spice of life that makes one want to harvest babies just like him. One of the features I enjoyed most was the music, and as I type, I'm checking for a movie soundtrack.

Since I've started to become more and more serious about hacking out an original screenplay, every time I hear music playing in the background, I acknowledge one thing: Is there a audio player in the scene? If not, then WTF is the music? and who exactly in the scene is supposed to be hearing it? These are questions that, if I can't answer myself, I interpret as deus-x-machina. There is really no real way a person can spoil a song for somebody; not like a review might contain spoilers for somebody who hasn't seen the film yet. Music is something godly, so why not deus-x-machina? It's when the music has lyrics that one can pretty much say that the director chose to cop-out in completing his scene's failed objective. I don't like that, and I didn't see much of that in Shoot `em up.

I was right about the outcome of this film, though. Don't hate me for being predictable. Films would have to be an R rating for it to end the way I would never expected it to end. Take the cartoon in today's blanket sin. Just by looking at the action in panels one thru three, one gets the impression (i hope) that the little boy doesn't like saliva in his hair. The fourth panel is supposed to enlighten, but my ability in drawing hair wax molded spikes is limited; so, nobody really sees the point. Consider that somebody actually reads this [cartoon] crap and I can imagine they would be totally clueless unless they had some appreciation for calligraphy. Considering the church has already claimed the bible as the word of god, words pretty much have already been claimed and copywritten. It's no wonder the WGA is slowly unraveling their agreements studio by studio.

I remember, before 9/11, when statistics on crime rates measured homicide as though by their execution. In other words, on such and such date, a total of so many people perished as a result of xyz. Sometimes the cause wouldn't even be a crime, but a plane crash, a train wreck, and auto accident. It got to a point that it seemed interesting to me to dig up info on the maximum number of victims a single killer might claim as a hashmark on his gun belt, sword, knife. I imagine this is how homicide detective think, especially when they have so many unsolved cold cases which somebody, already doing a life sentence for a different murder, might claim as one of the many murders he took a hand in. Shoot `em up is a film by somebody trying to rewrite the waste of life, while the quantities that died that one grim day, divided by the suspects and averaged out, might probably be one for the record books.



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